Celebrating Light

Imagine the world before electricity. I bet you'd tend your fire carefully. Make it last through the cold, dark night.
...And then comes dawn. Every morning is like a victory–the triumph of the light. 
That is why Indian holy days, like Diwali. celebrate the light. 
That is why Indian mantras, like Gayatri, invoke and worship the light as a divine power. 

It is. 

In yoga, I honor the "dawning of awareness" as the power of illumination which awakens, heals, and provides clear vision. 

But the light does not always come easy. Let me explain with a story: 

Once upon a time my husband and I were arguing. It was heated. Now, I can't even remember what it was about. But at the time I was quite certain–I had no doubt–that I was "RIGHT!"
He disagreed. He presented his case, but I doubled down on my point of view, again and again. I wanted him to realize (and admit) that I was "RIGHT!" 

Then something happened. Mid-sentence. It hit me like a floodlight: "Oh, shit. He is right... 
​
I'm wrong."

Daaaang! I felt just like Wile E. Cayote when he looks down from his full-throttle pace to realize that there is nothing beneath him but empty space and a long, hard fall. 

We celebrate the light as if it is always welcome. As if we are in a state of perpetual curiosity, always ready to expand and embrace personal development. 

But sometimes we're not.

Sometimes we think we already have the answer. We already know. We are "RIGHT!"...and nothing will change our minds. Then the light of awareness "dawns" on us illuminating our flaws. It isn't comfortable. Sometimes, truth be told, we wish we could stay in the dark. 

​Our practice often determines what happens next. 
Yoga provides the courage and compassion to face, and embrace, the light.

So back to that one time, when I was wrong:
I took a deep breath, mustered up the humility and said, "Wait. I'm just realizing that you are right. I am wrong. I am sorry."

My husband looked at me, first with surprise, then tenderness. "Yeah," he said. "I love you." 
I had braced myself for impact, but it turned out to be a super soft landing. Blissful in fact. 
Because in that moment, I realized that being wrong gives me the opportunity to experience his unconditional Love. If I were always "RIGHT," I would never feel the sweet sensation of forgiveness. 

When I embrace my imperfection it becomes a radiant gift. 
I am human, and growing. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Inspired by the words of Leonard Cohen: The cracks are where the light gets in. 
That realization has been, for me, like the break of a glorious new day. 

​Happy Diwali